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tourist trap
Fredericton
Penguin Lover Posts : 3,144
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On 7/5/2008 8:15:40 PM, mark8999 wrote: ppl that care about you don't care if you rock the boat. SOmetimes rocking the boat is just you being honest and being yourself. Those ppl who have issues with you being yourself aren't worth your time.
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That all depends on what "rocking the boat" means exactly. Chances are, they'd be the first ones to call you on it if you were "rocking the boat". Why would being contrary or obtuse equate with being honest? It may only if you're contrary or obtuse, in which case I'd take diplomacy any day.
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Posted: 7/5/2008 8:34:44 PM
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mark8999
Edmonton
ah summer Posts : 28
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On 7/5/2008 8:34:44 PM, tourist trap wrote: That all depends on what "rocking the boat" means exactly. Chances are, they'd be the first ones to call you on it if you were "rocking the boat". Why would being contrary or obtuse equate with being honest? It may only if you're contrary or obtuse, in which case I'd take diplomacy any day.
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diplomacy is nice when two parties are dealing with each other in good faith. What I mean by 'rocking the boat' is in a positive sense. I mean that you tell someone the truth even though it ruins their rose colored view of a situation. They may not be obtuse or contrary, but immature and they retaliate. eg. you are a good worker trap, but your coworkers have a bad attitude and undermine your work. You tell the boss in a diplomatic way, and he/she looks at you as being a s** disturber. So you tell the boss that the situation sucks and you are ready to walk. Your boss then fires you for your honesty. If the boss cared about you as a person and your feelings, then they would have addressed the situation not fired you to keep a false blissful environment. So in this situation, even though you lose your job, you also lose the boss who didn't give a d--- about you. This applies to any relationship, work or personal.
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Posted: 7/5/2008 9:03:57 PM
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jessicarab...
Vancouver
Realm of Experience Posts : 4,390
Jet Set
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On 7/5/2008 9:03:57 PM, mark8999 wrote: diplomacy is nice when two parties are dealing with each other in good faith. What I mean by 'rocking the boat' is in a positive sense. I mean that you tell someone the truth even though it ruins their rose colored view of a situation. They may not be obtuse or contrary, but immature and they retaliate. eg. you are a good worker trap, but your coworkers have a bad attitude and undermine your work. You tell the boss in a diplomatic way, and he/she looks at you as being a s** disturber. So you tell the boss that the situation sucks and you are ready to walk. Your boss then fires you for your honesty. If the boss cared about you as a person and your feelings, then they would have addressed the situation not fired you to keep a false blissful environment. So in this situation, even though you lose your job, you also lose the boss who didn't give a d--- about you. This applies to any relationship, work or personal.
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OK, I'll try to rock the boat. The US National Debt is: $9,478,647,121,750.67
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Posted: 7/5/2008 11:08:42 PM
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jessicarab...
Vancouver
Realm of Experience Posts : 4,390
Jet Set
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On 7/5/2008 6:43:33 PM, intricate wrote: hmmmm, perhaps. Or maybe you don't let enough of you shine through. Have an opinion, get annoyed occasionally, it's not always about power, but personality and fire. I think you are so easy going, because you are afraid to rock the boat sometimes, you are careful. Maybe it would be worth trying throwing caution to the wind?? you are great by the way, you don't give yourself enough credit. I think you are still in the process of finding yourself and holding onto who you are when you are with someone else, many of us are still in that process, trust me. when you get more solid with that i think you will find that you aren't perhaps quite so easy going ... i could be wrong though...
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Good points. Still my nature is much like my Chinese sign, the Ox. I'm usually a docile creature unless provoked and I don't get provoked as easily now that I'm older. Might be due to reading the wrong spiritual books when I was younger. I think someone recommended I read something along the lines of "if you see Buddha on the road kill him" to counter that, lol. Anyway, I guess I shouldn't be reading this either: I should probably be reading: Thanks for the objective input
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Posted: 7/5/2008 11:37:06 PM
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jessicarab...
Vancouver
Realm of Experience Posts : 4,390
Jet Set
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belly LOL
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Posted: 7/5/2008 11:43:07 PM
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li sa
Windsor
Bun in Oven Posts : 27,757
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ok, so how'd the coffee go?
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Posted: 7/7/2008 7:22:45 AM
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tripple b
Toronto
<3 Alisha <3 Posts : 28,996
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what's this about coffee? Did bw get together with this dude for coffee? all this talk about coffee.. i'm going to go get a tea now.. lol brb.
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Posted: 7/7/2008 7:29:45 AM
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shannon-m
Calgary
lethal Posts : 1,409
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I have been apart from a certain ex for 2 1/2 years and I still think about him and sometimes wonder how things would have been if he didn't move for work, but life goes on so you just need to think if it IS meant to be it will happen.
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Posted: 7/7/2008 7:42:01 AM
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li sa
Windsor
Bun in Oven Posts : 27,757
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On 7/7/2008 7:39:16 AM, tripple b wrote: but they went for coffee?
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they were supposed to, last thursday night
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Posted: 7/7/2008 7:46:51 AM
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Deleted User
NA
Posts : NA
Newbie
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On 7/5/2008 12:37:55 AM, trash wrote: she says that she had not been initially attracted to anyone she had gone out with previous to this guy so we are not talking about just dinner dates, we are talking about people she would have called boyfriends. every single one she had gone out with previous to this guy she had not been initially attracted to. if you are not attracted to them externally or internally, why make each of themm your your boyfriend?
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I wasn't intially physically attracted to the guys that ended up having long term relationships with. So you ask why did i date them to begin with, well....most of my long term relationships were when i was much younger, and i was a mindless creature that listened to her friends all the time, my friends thought they were hot, I though they were cool guys, so i gave them a chance and i fell in love. physical beauty isn't important, granted you need som sort of attraction to be with someone, and i did have an attraction for them, not really physcal though.
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Posted: 7/7/2008 9:57:29 AM
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Deleted User
NA
Posts : NA
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On 7/7/2008 7:22:45 AM, li sa wrote: ok, so how'd the coffee go?
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well, it went good. he heard me out...the best that i could possible do. We actually met up again last night...without getting into too much detail, we are going to take things slow and see where they lead. in the mean time, i need to learn to become more vocal, more considerate, and a better listener.
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Posted: 7/7/2008 9:59:39 AM
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li sa
Windsor
Bun in Oven Posts : 27,757
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On 7/7/2008 9:59:39 AM, blackwidow wrote: well, it went good. he heard me out...the best that i could possible do. We actually met up again last night...without getting into too much detail, we are going to take things slow and see where they lead. in the mean time, i need to learn to become more vocal, more considerate, and a better listener.
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very good
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Posted: 7/7/2008 10:04:38 AM
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